Showing posts with label REST. Show all posts
Showing posts with label REST. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

I guess you do exhibit optional code on demand.

Why am I under the desk?  I'm a REST endpoint!

I should have saved this one for Halloween.  I'd claim this costume for Halloween at work, but some smart ass would just accuse me of being idempotent all day.

"Servers can temporarily extend or customize the functionality of a client by the transfer of executable code. Examples of this may include compiled components such as Java applets and client-side scripts such as JavaScript."



Snarky: Why am I under the desk?  I'm a REST endpoint!
Title: I guess you do exhibit optional code on demand.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Who the hell is Mark?

You'll need to recode this portion of the project. As you can see, your REST design doesn't mesh with the new marchitecture.
Don't you dare think I made it up.  It's even in Wikipedia: marchitecture.  "Marchitecture (or Marketecture) is a portmanteau of the words marketing and architecture. The term is applied to any form of electronic architecture perceived to have been produced purely for marketing reasons. It may be used by a vendor to place itself in such a way as to promote all their strongest abilities whilst simultaneously masking their weaknesses."

Here's an article about the vendor-produced version at it-director.com: "A Marchitecture is an architecture produced for marketing reasons, normally by a vendor. It is designed to put the vendor in the best possible light by emphasizing the positive as well as hiding the negative. If you are in marketing you will spell it Marketecture."

I give you an example, although I in no way attest to whether it's a.) true and b.) personal.  Let's say you want to convince a potential customer that your product is as safe as possible.  A security document may get drafted that then requires that the code (and reality) be rebuilt in order to match the claimed design.  While it's good practice to incorporate security from the beginning, and agile may make security stories your priority anyway, approaching the code from a marketing decision, particularly because the marketing materials may be misinterpreted and lead to offshoots you didn't originally intend, is a frustrating path to follow.

Snarky: You'll need to recode this portion of the project. As you can see, your REST design doesn't mesh with the new marchitecture.
Title: Who the hell is Mark?

Thursday, August 9, 2012

I quit listening at Excel...

Tell them they can't change the REST interface. The COM add in we script against in Excel won't work. All those macros should be considered a dependency for any enterprise work.


This is one of those Snarkies were I considered many different punchlines.  Usually that happens because it's based on a real event, and I'm quietly telling myself at the time to shut up and not say all the things popping into my head.  No good can come from being snarky with a customer, unless the good is to lose the customer or your job.  Fortunately, I suspect only one of the customers I work with is capable of reading minds and she's an internal product owner, so I'll just get a squint, a shake of the head, and then a raised eyebrow or soft snort.

Titles options...

  • I heard, "yada yada yada COM...yada yada I'm a GenX manager."
  • Your macros should be put to REST.
  • If it was an add-in, that means it can be a take-out.
  • You lost me at Excel ("spreadsheet" for generic purposes?)
  • I quit listening at Excel...
  • WTF is COM?


Title: I quit listening at Excel...
Snarky: Tell them they can't change the REST interface. The COM add in we script against in Excel won't work. All those macros should be considered a dependency for any enterprise work.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

I'll leave a note to my future self to set the time machine for right now.

We don't just want backward compatible. We want future compatible.

This is a real statement regarding coordination of REST endpoints for a project I've worked on (he said the future compatible part, not the time machine part). If the developer who said it ever finds Snarky, I'll definitely give him credit for some inspired wordplay.

Title: I'll leave a note to my future self to set the time machine for right now.
Snarky: We don't just want backward compatible. We want future compatible.

Monday, May 21, 2012

If she is, then shouldn't we be restful?

Two in a Cube: I'd characterize our manager as indempotent.
I've always liked that word. Indempotent.  Reminds me of omnipotent, I think is why, even though they really have nothing in common other than the shared suffix, but it does have me wondering how long do you think an indempomnipotent manager would remain a manager? 

I suppose if the Peter Principle is in full effect where they are employed, it might be a good long while.



Wednesday, March 28, 2012

I see. So you're more of a non-technical manager, then?

Snarky: I'm sorry, but because you admitted to ACID, hashing, and lots of RESTing, HR says we can't hire you.

I know. Double entendres are just too easy. After all, everything is dirty if you just add, "You know what I mean?" to the end.  Or Monty Python's "Nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more, say no more, know what I mean, know what I mean?"  Try it, particularly if you have a significant other, or even a not so significant other.  Just use any one of those every time they use a non-standard word.  But snrky isn't responsible for any separation.

You can read about atomicity, consistency, isolation, durability, hash tables, and representational state transfer over at Wikipedia.


Snarky: I'm sorry, but because you admitted to ACID, hashing, and lots of RESTing, HR says we can't hire you.
Title: I see. So you're more of a non-technical manager, then?